I forgot how much I like Spandau Ballet.

I am now obsessed with '80s music circa 1983. I'm listening to Spandau Ballet's "True", and yep, I still like the album. And who could forget the sample of the song proper in P.M. Dawn's "Set Adrift on Memory Bliss"?

typical Chicago winter

the house in winter,
originally uploaded by urban mama.

The first snow this year was not benign. We had about four inches or so, but it sure does make the house look purty. The lights around the porch and the wreath that is on the door (which is not visible in the photo) is all we've done so far as exterior holiday decor. I think that's just peachy.

rolling into the holidays

I'm excited about the holiday season this year. The one cloud is that my father passed away during Thanksgiving weekend last year, so it will forever be a melancholy time of year for me. But, I am happy that the babies are doing well and are as happy as they can possibly be. They are such swell kids.

The big joint present this year is an old school style rocking horse similar to what D-Money had when he was wee. I think they'll both like it, and they'll both fight over it. Other than that, they'll get the usual assortment of books and fun things. Zee is getting the FP Kid Tough digital camera for her birthday and probably a small paul julius t-shirt. And a stuffed penguin that's two feet tall. I fear that she'll take it into her tiny and already overflowing with stuffed animals toddler bed with her. She's learned how to walk like a penguin and will perform on demand for a change. It is good stuff.

Intellectual strengths: Zee is excellent with puzzles and games, patterns, logic. O is excellent with problem solving (physical and mental) and building Duplo structures, and he's a charming little guy to boot. They have the makings of being evil geniuses if we don't instill any ethical standards with them.

I should be working.

It's slow today, and I'm spending my time messing around with Flickr and stalking home prices in the SFBA. Then I'll go home and coddle Mr. O, who's been stricken with a nasty illness that combines a super-stuffy nose, raging ear infection and scalding hot fever. Poor little man!

In related news - I came across a house in the LS that looks decent and that we could've afforded. Drat! I don't dare bring it up to D-Money. I can hear the groans of disappointment already.

Mr. O's birthday bash

cakes for all,
originally uploaded by urban mama.

Mr. O turned 1 on October 1. Amazing. We had a few of (my) friends over + one set of grandparents. It was the first party I've hosted in the house, and it went very well. I am now emboldened to hold future gatherings.

the uniform

Today I am wearing:

Wide-legged grey wool pants
Black cashmere turtleneck
Robert Clergerie black platform wedges from a few years ago

I still have my screaming pink wool dufflecoat by Isaac Mizrahi for Target, though I should cycle that out and keep it as a weekend coat. It's great for the playground and doing errands. The pockets can manage a big sippy cup. Don't tell me that's not handy.

Ssshhhh, I'm trying to read.

Am reading "Bel Canto" by Ann Patchett, finally, and the book follows me around everywhere. Next is "Longitude" by Dava Sobel and then that Calamity Physics book that just came out. I wish I could still take public transportation so I can maximize my reading time.

it's the plank for the likes of you.

Zee has been into pirates lately. She goes around the house chirping, "Ahoy, mateys!"

I finally ask her, "Is that what pirates say?"

"Nooo."

"Then what do pirates say?"

"Aaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrr".

well, it's been a while, hasn't it?

A friend who is positioning herself to become the next Marisha Pessl (or someone similar) has shamed me into posting a blog update. I am not going to make excuses, but I will say that there has been a significant amount of deep thought and reevalution. Basically, that means I've gotten myself a new job, one that hopefully will give me some management experience (I've got a staff of three, woohoo!) and more of a work/life balance.

I'd like to throw out there that Jane Austen is the first celebrity chick-lit author. Of course I'm right.

when books go bad

There have been an alarming number of recently released books dedicated to the occupation of motherhood. Books detailing the "war" between stay-at-home and working moms, the agonies of raising a child in upper middle class society, and so on, and so on, and so on.

I've made the executive decision to neither purchase nor borrow any of these mommy books because all they will do is cause self-doubt. Parenting is hard enough without the background chorus calling into question your every decision. The best feedback? Hearing your babes laugh every single day, and really laugh.

In other news, Mr. O is now the proud owner of one emerging bottom tooth. We have lift-off! He loves the outer space sticky on his wall. I was delighted to see that it had glow in the dark stars. It rocks the free world.

I caved and bought Zee a Dora the Explorer dvd. This one features a pirate episode with tons more music than usual. It's pop opera for the minis.

okay, now back to the house

we did buy a house! I was going to chronicle the process, but there really wasn't much to talk about. We're moving to a neighborhood in the city called Portage Park, which no one knows about and there's not a Starbucks in walking distance. So what it lacks in sheer hipness, the house more than makes up for it. It's a 1909 American 4-square - well-proportioned, a tasteful blue-grey in exterior color and with some original woodwork inside. It's not a huge house at 1400 sf or so, but it's just enough house for us and it felt good.

We've been talking up the blue-grey house to Z, and though she seems excited by it, she'll probably bunk with us for a week. She's been more clingy than usual lately and gave the new (and probably never returning) babysitter a lot of hell yesterday. D-money thinks she was disappointed that she wasn't spending the day with Mommy and was acting out. Good grief. Can I do anything without her freaking out?

The unfortunate, or maybe not, thing is that she is so dialed into my moods that they affect her more than I'd like. I've been tired and pensive lately and probably not the fun mommy of legend and lore.

I made some little Easter baskets for Z and O. Very modest with a few toys and books and candy that D-money and I are going to pilfer for ourselves. For D-money, I got a chocolate Peeps egg, which has to go down in history as one of the best ideas EVER. Did you hear me? EVER.

rollin' OX

OX's latest project is rolling over from his back to his belly. I let him have at it last night on our bed. He made all kinds of loud noises - yelps, squeals and grunts. He's almost got it; he just needs to get that one arm out of his way. And, when he does get close, he seems angry that his body betrayed him and flipped him over without his permission.

In other news, Zee went on her first field trip yesterday to the Shedd Aquarium. I had no feedback other than she was in a great mood when I went to pick them up. She likes these excursions, and on Saturday we may go to one of the children's museums or the nature museum in Lincoln Park for some mommy and Zee time.

he does NOT.

D-Money just said that OX looks exactly like...Yul Brynner.

No comment.

new topic: The Househunt

We've decided to become fully functioning adults by purchasing our first house. Now, said house has not fully presented itself to us yet, but I will be journalizing the process because it thus far has been what we call "very interesting".

oh, my baby boy.

Today is my last day of maternity leave. I'm sad. O did a series of Greatest Baby Hits today - spat up three times all over my clothes, pooped through an outfit, batted his eyes at the Baby in the Mirror - and we ended the day with him snoozing in my arms. He's my Ferdinand the Bull.

a letter to my late father

Dear Daddy,

We're barreling toward 2006, and you're not here to see it with us. I am so sorry I didn't see you more often. Truth be known, I was scared. Scared that every time I saw you, I would see that a little more of you has died. Now that you're truly gone, I wish I could have had one last conversation with you. I would tell you about how I love being a mother and how wonderfully my two children are growing up. I would tell you about how happy OX is to be alive. I would bring OX to you so you can hold your first grandson. I would bring Z. to you so you can laugh and enjoy what a special little personality she is.

For the rest of my life, not just 2006, I resolve to be as kind and generous as you were with many people beyond our family circle. You were a loved man. I think life didn't turn out the way you would've liked it to, but despite the setbacks and hard immigrant's life, you still found ways to experience joy and took pleasure in the simple things.

You and I didn't see eye to eye on many things, but I always respected your opinion. You always had perfectly logical reasons for your decisions and ideas, and I appreciate that you respected us enough to explain why we should or shouldn't do certain things. I also appreciate that you allowed me to make my own choices and not dictate how my life should go. I didn't always make the right choice, but boy, I did learn hard from my mistakes.

Please rest in peace knowing that I have a loving husband, two wonderful children and a comfortable life where we never have to worry about where our next meal is coming from and that we can afford a good life for our kids.

We love and miss you terribly. You are always in my heart.

why do babies' heads smell so good?

It's a combination of that sleep smell and baby powder. OX always smells nice. Thank God he's smiling and cooing regularly now. I was about to lose my mind.

quick thoughts on goals

What do I want to accomplish next year?

1. Find my creative outlet.

2. Write a description of my dream job/career and make it so.

3. Find a dinner catering service for weeknights so I stop obsessing about feeding the fam after doing the evil commute with cranky kids in the car.

4. Read a book every month.

5. Stick to my budget.

all is quiet on the midwestern front.

OX is taking his mid-day nap, and every once in a while he'll let out a yelp or cry. I now remember this being those sleep cries I've read about, so I no longer jostle him out of slumber to see if he's hungry or his diaper's ready to explode.

He's becoming more of a little person now. He's generally mellow; he sat peacefully in his bouncy chair last night while Zoe had her mac & cheese and I supervised. He hasn't been in the kitchen all that much and was interested in the sights and smells. He's also a strong little OX and can hold his head up for a few seconds at his tender age. He's slightly interested in the mobile that plays classical music (yep, we fell for that gimmick). He's an observer, I think, and will test things before coming to a conclusion. Whereas his sister always reacts before considering whether it really is a terrible thing or not.

I like it when Z-Bot and OX stare at each other. I was worried that she would exhibit more resentment. Luckily, she doesn't mind having him around and will go looking for him if he's crying. I've tried to give her a lot of me-time, but I have to confess that the tv is on more often than I'd like if only to give me some time to nurse him.

It's a beautiful fall in Chicago thus far. Today it's windy and sunny. It's been quite mild and definitely livable. I have to laugh at my SF friends who were wearing down jackets in 50 degree weather while I was jacket-less. I'm acclimated to the midwest!

A side note about the wedding - for the most part, everything went smoothly with the usual hiccups. It was wonderful to see R. get married and I saw a lot of old friends. The bridesmaid's dress fit. I got false eyelashes and pro makeup done, and I felt very, very pretty.

I'm really going to do it this year.

I signed up for this year's NaNoWriMo. I've been trying to finish this for three years now. Am I going to manage a 50,000 novel this November? Well, if OX decides to remain a sleepy dude, I just might crack 10,000 words.

As they say, nothing ventured, nothing gained.